Joke #1
A man and
woman had been married for more than 60 years. They had shared
everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets
from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the
top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or
ask her about.
For all of
these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day the little
old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover. In
trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe
box and took it to his wife’s bedside. She agreed that it was
time that he should know what was in the box.
When he
opened it, he found two crocheted doilies and a stack of money totaling
$95,000. He asked her about the contents. “When we were to be
married,” she said, “my grandmother told me the secret of a
happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry
with you, I should just keep quiet and crochet a doily.”
“The
little old man was so moved; he had to fight back tears. Only two
precious doilies were in the box. She had only been angry with him two
times in all those years of living and loving. He almost burst with
happiness.
“Honey,”
he said, “that explains the doilies, but what about all of this
money? Where did it come from?”
“Oh,”
she said, “that’s the money I made from selling the
doilies.”
Joke #2
A woman
walks into a yarn store and asks for a length of wool yarn.
The
shopkeeper asks,"How long do you need it?"
The lady,
new to the hobby of crochet, thought it over, then responded, "I guess
I'll need it for a pretty long time. I'm going to make a sweater!"
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